Fear

 Fear? Why Fear? What is the point of fear? Obviously it was instilled in our genes to help us survive, but that was fear of death. Now we have “fear” of a lot of things – heights, water, snakes, spiders, and left turns… I’m not sure I can call that a fear, so much as a bad experience. Our ancestors feared death, but obviously had not experienced it before they feared it. So what makes all these other “fears” so different? Is it that we have become fragile as a species? Or, could it be that we “fear” these things because we cannot control elements of them. Do we fear them because they are outside our comfort zone? A person cannot control the speed of their fall. They cannot control what lurks beneath the surface of the water. They cannot control the actions of the snake and spider. They can’t control the other drivers while making a left turn…
If “the only thing we have to fear is fear itself” why don’t we fear “fear”? Because fear is familiar? Are we no longer afraid of death when it looms over us for so long? Are we not afraid of heights when we stand on the edge our whole lives? Are we not afraid of left turns because we’ve made so many?

 Fear Is Familiar

When fear becomes familiar, it becomes dull. It no longer has hold over what you do, thing, or say. It cannot define your space, but it will remain an obstacle. You can function under it, but do not hold your head high, or you will lose to fear. The only way to return to a life worth living is to remove fear. To remove fear you must throw yourself into your fear. Break the obstacle, because there is no “getting around it”. Unfortunately I believe that those that fear death do not have that choice. They must experience death through the eyes of others, and I believe that this is how some people become killers. Death is not controllable, they cannot be there when an elder dies. They do not know when a accident will occur. Therefore, they take it upon themselves, and give themselves control over the lives of others. For those people, this is their “control of death” how they stop fearing it. However; this is still my humble opinion. I am no psychologist nor an expert on killers. Only a self-proclaimed philosopher. One who has been close to death, and close to suicide, many years ago. And I hope that whoever may read this will keep my secret.

 

Keep My Secret

I have asked this of you, reader, because I want to trust you. I need to trust you. It was my fear to tell of my closeness with death via my own thoughts of suicide. And by trusting you, I was able to break my fear. Trust is key to throwing yourself into your fear. If you’re afraid of the uncontrollable, you have to trust the odds. If you’re afraid of left turns, you must trust that other drivers know what they’re doing. Trust is the key. Ultimately, the gruesome fact of killers is that they trust that how they choose to commit their crime will work. You must trust that you throwing yourself into your fear will not end you.
You must have trust, to break your fear, so that you may live a full life.